https://connachttribune.ie/mastering-the-art-of-walking-and-cutting-in-straight-lines/
“Who’s that?” says Gobnait (not her real name) whose house I used to pass on my pre-lockdown walk. “It’s me”, I’d say, lifting my sunglasses to prove I’m not Lady Gaga incognito.
It’s her way of telling me I should catch myself on
for wearing sunglasses in the middle of January. I could tell her I have light
sensitive eyes but she doesn’t suffer fools gladly and I admire her astuteness.
I’ve changed my route since lockdown because the road
isn’t wide enough to accommodate my ego and social distancing. That’s what
Gobnait would say and I miss our daily dalliance. Despite that, and with the
easing of lockdown imminent, I find myself reluctant to relinquish my newfound
bubble, for various reasons.
My DIY haircut with blunt scissors didn’t go as
planned. Just cut in a straight line, what could possibly go wrong? Everything.
One side was shorter than the other and in a scene reminiscent of Father Ted’s
dented car sketch (I’ll just give it one more tap), I kept cutting until one
side was aligned with my upper ear while the other hovered in follicular limbo
just below the chin.
Panicking ahead of a Zoom meeting, my options included
the following: a bandana (a la Duran Duran), a balaclava (a la bank robber) or
a baseball cap (a la who’s that eejit?). I went with the latter and kept my
head down until someone said, “who’s that in the baseball cap”?
I also haven’t mastered the art of making sourdough
bread (my heart’s not really in it) and, while the rest of the country has been
spring cleaning since March, I haven’t even started.
I’m not ready to stop listening to the sound of the
cuckoo, carried in the wind from the Burren across the bay and the butterflies
of giddiness it unleashes, leaving endorphin infused contrails in their wake.
Whilst I cling to lockdown like Paschal Donohoe clings
to his ministerial salary, many are chomping at the bit for freedom.
A vexed psychologist on RTE, warned of the
psychological impact of children not being able to hug their grannies. If
there’s a second wave, as already seen in Germany and China, what about the
psychological impact on the child if granny dies of coronavirus?
What about the psychological impact on the doctor working
with dwindling resources who has to decide who gets the last ICU bed and/or
ventilator? And what about the psychological impact on the nurse who has to
tell the family that their loved one has died.
At time of writing, 30% of the people diagnosed with
coronavirus are previously healthy Health Care Workers. What of the
psychological impact on them and their families who risk their lives to save
ours? The shortage of PPE is an ongoing worry for healthcare staff with reports
of post-traumatic stress disorder emerging, unsurprisingly. If there is a
second wave, our capacity to respond could be significantly depleted.
Meanwhile, having spent six weeks in lockdown,
leaving many financially destitute, it emerged that people continued to enter
Ireland and the safeguards, such as self-isolating and filling in contact
tracing forms, weren’t actually mandatory and therefore as effective as a
chocolate tea pot.
Data from one week alone revealed that more than a third of passengers arriving at Dublin
Airport and a quarter of those coming in at Dublin Port who were asked to self-isolate did not respond
to follow-up calls, many were untraceable.
When confronted with
this revelation in the Dáil last week, Leo Varadkar said that mandatory
quarantine might be forthcoming but warned about the impact on tourism. The elephant
in the room of course is Britain. Our nearest neighbour, which has the second
highest death rate from coronavirus in the world.
In non-lockdown conditions, one contagious person can
infect, on average 3 people, who will then potentially infect another three. By
the time you multiply that variable 10 times, exponentially the original person
could have infected over 88,000 people.
That’s why New Zealand’s premier, Jacinda Ardern
locked down early, quarantining everyone entering the country and rolling out
rigorous contact tracing and testing regimes. After one month and twenty deaths,
she reduced the infection rate to zero enabling the safe easing of lockdown.
As long as Ireland’s border strategy against Coronavirus
remains that of voluntary quarantining, I’m staying in lockdown.
Gobnait and I
have started a Zoom book club and our first book is, “Who’s that” by D.O Lally.
It’s about a girl with lopsided hair who wears dark glasses in January and goes
cuckoo trying to make sourdough bread in a ramshackled kitchen, somewhere in
county Galway (recommended reading age 0-3mths).